Ass what do you do with it??

Subject: Words of Wisdom

Life is all about ass; you're either covering it,
laughing it off,
kicking it,
kissing it,
busting it,
trying to get a piece of it,
or dealing with someone behaving like one ....
Have a nice day.











Ok so it's not as funny if the ass doesn't wiggle.
That's what it did for me on the email I received.
Sorry I wish I knew how to make it wiggle.

So are you thinking about buying a new bed??

Watch out for those water bed pranksters. I was in search of a good funny video and came across this. I'm not sure what the language it sounds like German to me. At least they warned them to take out their keys and cell phone before they tried it. Iit's good for a laugh, be sure to watch it to the end the last couple is the best!

Dwight trying to figure out our new masage chair! Thanks April and Kevin! 

I hope I picked the ones that you wanted me to post. You look like a princess holding those flowers. 

Yay I got the biggest one! I love big presents

Hey April I want a taste of that first cake you bake! 

Here's April with her biggest present ever, it's from Kevin. She was so excited even though she knew what it was! Notice how she likes to wear bows. 

Hi it's been a long time since I posted, I'm sure I wasn't missed too much but with Christmas sneaking up on me I just haven't had time or even felt like tying. I got this e-mail from my brother and it gave me a good chuckle mostly because I have received every one of these emails. Hope you enjoy it too.

This is a Hoot!!

My heartfelt appreciation goes out to all of you who have taken the time and trouble to send me "forwards" over the past 12 months. Thank you for making me feel safe, secure, blessed, and wealthy. Extra thanks for the ones that I have to open 15 times to get to the message.

Special thanks to whoever sent me the one about rat crap in the glue on envelopes 'cause I now have to go get a wet towel every time I need to seal an envelope. Also, I scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason. Because of your concern I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.

I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr Pepper since the people who make these products are atheists who won't put "Under God" on their cans.

I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer. I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.

I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day. I no longer go to shopping malls because someone might drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.

I no longer receive packages from nor send packages by UPS or FedEx since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.
I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan.

I no longer eat KFC because their "chickens" are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.

I no longer have any sneakers -- but that will change once I receive my free replacement pair from Nike.

I no longer have to buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now have their recipe. I no longer worry about my soul because at last count I have 363,214 angels looking out for me. Thanks to you, I have learned that God only answers my prayers if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.

I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl who is about to die in the hospital (for the 1,387,258th time) I no longer have any money at all - but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special email program.

Yes, I want to thank you so much for looking out for me that I will now return the favor! If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 7 minutes, a large pigeon with a wicked case of diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00 PM (CDT) this afternoon. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbor's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's beautician.

Hope you all had a great Christmas!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR

More Christmas vedios... oh my

OK so the last one was so bad that I had to take it off, but as I was looking for another one I came to the conclusion that there are some very sucky Christmas videos, Yes it's true I checked out a few and even I'm not dorkie enough to put them on my blog. I don't think this one will be on here long either but until I find something better it will have to do. Well what do I have to say... Tonight is Tuesday and after tonight I only have 2 more nights and then Christmas Vacation!!! Yay! I will not have to work again until January 2006 I can't wait. Well I guess I shouldn't be wishing my life away but that's too bad. Being able to have a normal sleep pattern just feels so good. I wish I could say that I was done with my Christmas shopping but I thought I would wait until the week before Christmas since I have it off I can maybe make a trip to GF to do some shopping. There is a lot more places to go to. Dwight and I talked about going last week end but the weather was just too bad for a unnecessary road trip. I do have one gift bought but other than that I don't know what to get everyone and I'm always confused as to who all to buy for. Take the school for starters. The last few years I have been able to give gifts to all of the kids in my dorm. But now all the students are in the same area, there are just too many of them and the middle school and high school boys are very hard to find something inexpensive for all of them. Even though I had gifts that I bought last year for everyone that is in this dorm for this year I may not give any of the students gifts. Although there are a couple that I would like to try to give some thing too just because they are the ones that I have worked with the most. I thought I could maybe put it in their home going bag on the last day and the other students would never know that they got something. Yeah that might work. I'm sorry to say that this typing is making me tired so I'm going to get off the computer for now.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!! Well almost anyway!

Crazy video for all you cazy Bloggers out there. I will be changing the video often. Check back and see what other wacky vetoes I can find.

Yay Alicia is coming home!

I got a call from Alicia this morning, and she told me that she will be taking the bus home tomorrow! Yep if she gets a job by January she will be more of less done with Job Corp! They will continue to follow her and make sure she gets something that is going to work for her. She tells me that she is going to miss it. I wasn't too surprised by that, She seemed so happy there. Even when she said she hated the place and couldn't wait to get out of there and go home. Dwight told me that when he left he missed it so much and wanted to stay. I guess he was right! Things are happening so fast. I think her head is going to be spinning for a while. She was telling me that there is a new girl that just started just a couple of days ago, and Alicia wishes she could be there to help her adjust. Alicia is the only person that she will talk to. I'm pretty sure she will find someone else there to help her but Alicia is worried about her. I'm sure everything will work out. See ya soon Alicia!!

This was taken at 8:15am I was hoping for
better lighting, it's not the best picture of the car
but it shows the kind of weather we are having
this morning. :(

I was hoping for a better picture this morning
but the snow looks kind of cool don't you think?

Sweet This one was taken through the window yesterday, but at least you can kind of see the color.

OMG Where are all the blogs!!!

I don't know if this post is even going to work but here goes. I have been trying to look at some blogs and none of them will come up. I'm guessing that the surver is down. I hope all my bloger freinds can handle that! So many of them are going to have anxity attacks and or breakdowns. I don't know if they can handle not being able to blog or read blogs. I hope that they can fix it soon. I personlly will miss the reading more than the actual posting. I have some pictures for Alicia to see and I will try to put some on here, they aren't the best because I tried to take them through the window. I think I will try to take some outside tomorrow morning. And post again I'm sure they will be better pictures.